英语幽默笑话大全爆笑
笑话是幽默的语言表达。它是一种常见的幽默传达方式。下面是本站小编带来的爆笑英语幽默笑话大全，欢迎阅读!
是他的错 Its His Fault
Its His Fault
是他的错
Billy and Bobby were brothers, and they often had fights with each other.
比利和波比是两兄弟，两人经常打架。
Last Saturday their mother said to them, "I'm going to cook our lunch now. Go out and play in the garden - and be good."
上个星期六，他们的妈妈对他们说：“我现在要做午饭了。去，到花园去玩吧，别淘气。”
"Yes, Mummy." the two boys answered, and they went out.
“是，妈妈。”两个男孩回答，然后他们就出去了。
They played in the garden for hAlf an hour, and then Billy ran into the kitchen, "Mummy, " he said, "Bobby's broken a window in Mrs. Allens' house."
他们在花园里玩了半个小时，然后比利跑进了厨房。“妈妈，”他说：“ 波比打碎了艾伦太太家的窗玻璃。”
"He's a bad boy," his mother said. "How did he break it?"
“他是个坏孩子。”他妈妈说。“他是怎么把玻璃打碎的?”
"I threw a stone at him," Billy answered,"and he quickly ducked.".
“我朝他扔了一块石子，”比利回答：“他蹲下了。”
爆笑英语幽默笑话大全阅读Never Mind
坐到了后坐上
A drunk phoned police to report that thieves had been in his car. "They've stolen thedashboard, the steering wheel, even the brake pedal!" he cried out.
一个醉汉打电话给警察局，报告小偷光顾了他的车，“他们偷走了仪表盘、方向盘，甚至连刹车脚板都偷走了。”
However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time "Nevermind," the drunk said with a hiccup, "I got in the back seat by mistake."
然而在警察还没有开始调查时，电话又一次响了起来，“没事了”，醉汉打着嗝说，“我不小心坐到了后坐上。”
爆笑英语幽默笑话大全学习一个有效的方法 Useful Way
Useful Way
一个有效的方法
Father: Jack, why do you drink so much water?
爸爸：杰克，你干嘛喝这么多水呀?
Jack: I have just had an apple, Dad.
杰克：我刚才吃了个苹果，爸爸。
Father: What's that got to do with it?
爸爸：可是这跟喝水有什么关系呢?
Jack: I forgot to wash the apple.
杰克：我忘了洗苹果呀。
爆笑英语幽默笑话大全欣赏A Present
凯特的礼物
Kate: Mom, do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday?
凯特：妈妈，你知道我要给你一件什么生日礼物吗?
Mom: No, Honey, what?
妈妈：不知道，宝贝，是什么呀?
Kate: A nice teapot.
凯特：一把漂亮的茶壶。
Mom: But I've got a nice teapot.
妈妈：可是我已经有一把漂亮的茶壶了呀。
Kate: No, you haven't. I've just dropped it.
凯特：不，你没有了。我刚刚把它给摔了。
爆笑英语幽默笑话大全品味Always Thirsty
总感到口渴
"I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me."
一个男人对他的朋友说：“我动了一次手术，手术后医生把一块海绵忘在我的身体里了。”
"That's terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?"
“真是太糟糕了!”朋友说道：“你觉得疼吗?”
"No, but I am always thirsty!"
“不疼，可是我总感到口渴。”
爆笑英语幽默笑话大全摘抄A soldier's Brilliant Idea
士兵坐飞机有美女陪伴的高招
Mr. Robinson had to travel somewhere on business, and as he was in a hurry, he decided to go by air. He liked sitting beside a window when he was flying, so when he got on to the plane, he looked for a window seat. He found all of them had already had been taken except for one. There was a soldier sitting in the seat beside this one, and Mr. Robinson was surprised that he had not taken the one by the window; but, anyhow, he at once went towards it.
由于生意方面的事，罗宾逊先生得出趟门。因为有点紧急，他决定坐飞机。乘机旅行时，他喜欢靠窗坐，故而一登机，他就寻找一个靠窗的座位。他发现只有一个靠窗的座位还空着。在那空座位边坐着一名士兵。令罗宾逊先生纳闷的是，这位士兵没有坐靠窗的位置。罗宾逊先生不管那些，他马上径直朝那个空座位走去。
When he reached it, however, he saw that there was a notice on it. It was written in ink and said, "This seat is preserved for proper load balance, thank you." Mr Robinson had never seen such an unusual notice in a plane before, but he thought that the plane must be carrying something particularly heavy in it, so he walked on and found another empty seat, not beside a window, to sit in.
然而，等到了那儿，他看见座位上有则启事，是用钢笔写的：“为保持装载平衡，特预设该位置，谢谢合作。”罗宾逊先生还从来没有在飞机上见过如此不同寻常的启事。不过，他想飞机上一定装了什么特别重的物品，于是他找了个不靠窗的位置。
Two or three people tried to sit in the window seat beside the soldier, but they too read the notice and went on, when the plane was nearly full, a very beautiful girl hurried into the plane. The soldier, who was watching the passengers coming in, quickly took the notice off the seat beside himself and in this way succeededin having the company of the girl during the whole trip.
又有两三个乘客试图坐在那个士兵旁的靠窗座位上，他们看到那则启事就走开了。当快满座时，一位非常美丽的姑娘匆匆走进机舱。一直在注意进舱旅客的那个士兵赶紧拿掉他旁边空座位上的启事。士兵用这种办法，成功地找到了一位姑娘一路作伴。
