经典科幻文学:《基本上无害 Mostly Harmless》 第18章12

‘Because if you’ve got the Guide you think that you are the one it’s working for. Everything went swimmingly smoothly for me from then on, up to the very moment that I come up against the totty with the rock, then, bang, I’m history. I’m out of the loop.’

“因为如果你得到了《指南》，你会以为它在为你工作，从那时候起一切都滑稽得难以置信，直到我遇上了那个拿石头的小屁孩，然后，砰，我玩完了，什么都没我的份了。”

‘Are you referring to my daughter?’

“你指的是我女儿吗？”

‘As politely as I can. She’s the next one in the chain who will think that everything is going fabulously for her. She can beat whoever she likes around the head with bits of the landscape, everything will just swim for her until she’s done whatever she’s supposed to do and then it will be all up for her too. It’s reverse temporal engineering, and clearly nobody understood what was being unleashed!’

“并且用的是尽可能礼貌的语言。她会是链条上的下一环，会以为一切都妙不可言。她可以拿着一小块地面爱砸谁的脑袋就砸谁的脑袋，直到她干完了那东西需要的事儿然后她也就玩完了。这就是短期反向操控，而且显然没人明白我们放出来个什么东西！”

‘Like me for instance.’

“比如说我。”

‘What? Oh, wake up, Arthur. Look, let me try it again. The new Guide came out of the research labs. It made use of this new technology of Unfiltered Perception. Do you know what that means?’

“什么？哦，醒醒吧，阿瑟。听着，让我再试一次。新《指南》是从研究室出来的，用了新技术，无过滤感知。你知道这是什么意思吗？”

‘Look, I’ve been making sandwiches for Bob’s sake!’

“听着，我一直在做三明治看在鲍伯的份上！”

‘Who’s Bob?’

“鲍伯是谁？”

‘Never mind. Just carry on.’

“算了，你继续说。”

‘Unfiltered Perception means it perceives everything. Got that? I don’t perceive everything. You don’t perceive everything. We have filters. The new Guide doesn’t have any sense filters. It perceives everything. It wasn’t a complicated technological idea. It was just a question of leaving a bit out. Got it?’

“无过滤感知就意味着它能感知一切，明白了？我不能感知一切，你也不能感知一切，我们都要过滤掉一些东西，新《指南》却没有任何感知过滤器。它感知一切。从技术上讲倒不是很复杂，问题只在于是省去某些部分，明白？”

‘Why don’t I just say that I’ve got it, and then you can carry on regardless.’

“我干嘛不干脆告诉你我明白了，然后你就可以管他三七二十一继续讲下去。”

‘Right. Now because the bird can perceive every possible Universe, it is present in every possible universe. Yes?’

“好，所以说，因为那只鸟可以感知所有可能的宇宙，于是它就出现在了每一个宇宙里。对吧？”

‘Y… e… e… s. Ish.’

“没-没-没-错。好像。”

‘So what happens is, the bozos in the marketing and accounting departments say, oh that sounds good, doesn’t that mean we only have to make one of them and then sell it an infinite number of times? Don’t squint at me like that, Arthur, this is how accountants think!’

“于是，市场和会计部的傻帽就说，哦听起来棒极了，不是吗，这么一来我们不就可以做一本《指南》然后卖上个无数次？别那样眯着眼睛看我，阿瑟，我说的是会计的想法！”

‘That’s quite clever, isn’t it?’

“挺聪明的，不是吗？”